Bill Cosby, fully William Henry "Bill" Cosby Jr.

Bill
Cosby, fully William Henry "Bill" Cosby Jr.
1937

American Contemporary Comedian, Author, Television/Movie Producer, Actor

Author Quotes

Suddenly, this romantic agony was enriched by a less romantic one: I had to go to the bathroom. Needless to say, I couldn't let her know about this urge, for great lovers never did such things. The answer to Romeo Romeo, wherefore art thou, Romeo? was not In the men's room, Julie.

The Internet is like Hitler they think they are getting rid of the problem but they're not

The worst thing to do is to die while reading LIFE magazine.

They're standing on the corner and they can't speak English. I can't even talk the way these people talk: Why you ain't, Where you is? . . . I blamed the kid, until I heard the mother talk. . . . And then I heard the father talk. Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth!

We've got to get the gun out of the hands of people who are supposed to be on neighborhood watch.

A thought comes . . . it's a true feeling, a funny feeling. And I get to develop it. [Writing] is more fun than performing, because I get to color with words.

Anyone should be able to say on stage what they want. But those who have knowledge, do understand that certain things on stage can be abused and misused. And if such topics are used just for laughter, the humor will not stand the test of time.

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that allow their children to come back home.

I don't think you can bring the races together by joking about the differences between them. I'd rather talk about the similarities, about what's universal in their experiences.

I see Obama as Sisyphus in the first four years. And nobody would speak about the size of the rock, or the elevation of the hill. All you hear people talk about is what he didn't do.

I watch an awful lot of television, and I get a little tired of what I see... We have about six television sets in our house, and it's less expensive for me to do a television series than it is for me to throw them all out.

I'm not going out and hitting a 95-mph fastball where I can't see the stitches. I'm not on a professional football team looking to tackle a fullback who is built like solid wood. I'm a thinking person, and I've been blessed with the ability to see some things and talk about them in a way that registers in a humorous and funny way.

It doesn't have to be that way.

Like everyone else who makes the mistake of getting older, I begin each day with coffee and obituaries.

Never say [to younger people] that was before your time, because the last full moon was before their time!

People have all kinds of approaches when they come up to me. Some of them are so nervous: 'You know, Mr. Cosby, you are my biggest fan!' I am? Some of them even claim that I raised them.

Take that money and build something you can see ... something for the children.

The main goal of the future is to stop violence. The world is addicted to it.

There are certain times of the day when you need a balance - that is, your protein and your carbs. I'm a Barry Sears man. I believe that anything green is a carb, and I need 2:1. Two of the carbs to one of the protein.

Things are old. Parts are old. I'm talking about 'us' parts. AARP-parts. Some of us were born with stronger parts than others.

We've got to take the neighborhood back. We've got to go in there. Just forget telling your child to go to the Peace Corps. It's right around the corner. It's standing on the corner. It can't speak English. It doesn't want to speak English. I can't even talk the way these people talk. "Why you ain't where you is go." I don't know who these people are. And I blamed the kid until I heard the mother talk. Then I heard the father talk. This is all in the house. You used to talk a certain way on the corner and you got into the house and switched to English. Everybody knows it's important to speak English except these knuckleheads. You can't land a plane with "why you ain't?". You can't be a doctor with that kind of crap coming out of your mouth. There is no Bible that has that kind of language. Where did these people get the idea that they're moving ahead on this? Well, they know they're not, they're just hanging out in the same place, five or six generations sitting in the projects when you're just supposed to stay there long enough to get a job and move out.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need advice

As I have discovered by examining my past, I started out as a child. Coincidentally, so did my brother. My mother did not put all her eggs in one basket, so to speak: she gave me a younger brother named Russell, who taught me what was meant by survival of the fittest.

Family is conflict and it's something that we all relate to.

Author Picture
First Name
Bill
Last Name
Cosby, fully William Henry "Bill" Cosby Jr.
Birth Date
1937
Bio

American Contemporary Comedian, Author, Television/Movie Producer, Actor