Chuck Palahniuk, fully Charles Michael "Chuck" Palahniuk

Palahniuk, fully Charles Michael "Chuck" Palahniuk

American Novelist and Freelance Journalist with movies including Fight Club, Choke, Snuff, Romance

Author Quotes

Why have I sold out? You think I'm supposed to grow old, beating some trite old protest drum that people don't hear anymore? Please; protest is now just a backdrop for a Diesel clothing ad in a slick fashion magazine. My goal is to create a metaphor that changes our reality by charming people into considering their world in a different way. It's time ? for me, at least ? to be clever and seduce people by entertaining them. I'll never be heard if I'm always ranting and griping.

Writers should be able to fully deduct from their taxes all writing-related expenses, including alcohol, parking tickets, court judgments, fines for lewd public behavior, Zoloft, and cigarettes.

You can spend your whole life building a wall of facts between you and anything real.

You gain power by pretending to be weak. By contrast, you make people feel strong. You save people by letting them save you.

You know, the condom is the glass slipper of our generation. You slip it on when you meet a stranger. You dance all night, then you throw it away.

You?ve thrown down the gauntlet. You?ve brought my wrath down upon your house. Now, to prove that I exist I must kill you. As the child outlives the father, so must the character bury the author. If you are, in fact, my continuing author, then killing you will end my existence as well. Small loss. Such a life, as your puppet, is not worth living. But? If I destroy you and your dreck script, and I still exist? then my existence will be glorious, for I will become my own master.

Why is it you feel like a dope if you laugh alone, but that's usually how you end up crying?

Writing is like sex, if it's difficult you're not doing it right.

You can tell a more over-the-top incredible story if you use a nonfiction form.

You grow up to become living proof of your parents' limitations. Their less-than masterpiece.

You love me. You ignore me. You save my life, then you cook my mother into soap.

You'll need to suffer to make any real art.

Why should I believe any of this?' It happens that fast. I say, because I think I like you. Marla says, 'Not love?' This is a cheesy enough moment, I say. Don't push it.

Yeah. Well. Whatever. You can't teach God anything.

You can?t fool people into loving you.

You had to risk your life to get love. You had to get right to the edge of death to ever be saved.

You must realize that one day you will die. Until then you are worthless.

Your being born makes your parents God. You owe them your life, and they can control you. Then puberty makes you Satan, just because you want something better.

With a gun barrel between your teeth, you speak only in vowels.

Years of living in the hope that what you'll get will be better than what you have. Years of looking and feeling worse in the hope that you might look better.

You cannot be the person they know and the great, glorious person you want to become. Not at the same time.

You have a choice. Live or die. Every breath is a choice. Every minute is a choice. Every time you don't throw yourself down the stairs, that's a choice. Every time you don't crash your car, you re-enlist.

You only ask people about themselves so you can tell them about yourself.

Your birth is a mistake you?ll spend your whole life trying to correct.

With a gun stuck in your mouth and the barrel of the gun between your teeth, you can only talk in vowels.

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Palahniuk, fully Charles Michael "Chuck" Palahniuk
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American Novelist and Freelance Journalist with movies including Fight Club, Choke, Snuff, Romance