Tom Robbins, fully Thomas Eugene "Tom" Robbins

Robbins, fully Thomas Eugene "Tom" Robbins

American Novelist

Author Quotes

There is a similarity between juggling and composing on the typewriter. The trick is, when you spill something, make it look like a part of the act.

Things. Cosas. Things attach themselves like leeches to the human soul, then they bleed out the sweetness and the music and the primordial joy of being unencumbered upon the land.

To pragmatists, the letter Z is nothing more than a phonetically symbolic glyph, a minor sign easily learned, readily assimilated, and occasionally deployed in the course of a literate life. To cynics, Z is just an S with a stick up its butt.

Well, there's one thing to be said for money. It can make you rich.

When you're unhappy, you get to pay a lot of attention to yourself. And you get to take yourself oh so very seriously. Your truly happy people, which is to say, your people who truly like themselves, they don't think about themselves very much. Your unhappy person resents it when you try to cheer him up, because that means he has to stop dwellin' on himself and start payin' attention to the universe. Unhappiness is the ultimate form of self-indulgence.

Your friend insults the homeless by giving them no credit for having made the decisions that shaped their lives, and demeans them further by declaring them powerless to alter their situations. There’re many ways, my dear, to victimize people. The most insidious way is to persuade them that they’re victims.

The spring bubbled in the little glade, a clearing lit like an alter by the ever ceremonious moon.

There is little difference between the Zulu warrior who smeared bis body with lion's fat and the modern woman who dabs hers with expensive perfume. The one was trying to acquire the courage of the king of beasts, the other is attempting to acquire the irresistible sexuality of flowers. The underlying principle is the same.

This baby (the Remington SL3 typewriter) speaks electric Shakespeare at the slightest provocation and will rap out a page and a half if you just look at it hard.

To this day it hovers in plump passivity above the fertile fields. It is a perfect emblem for the people and the land.

We're our own dragons as well as our own heroes, and we have to rescue ourselves from ourselves.

Whether a man is a criminal or a public servant is purely a matter of perspective.

Your petal from the salty rose.

The sun was low but the air was still balmy, and the sea was the shade of blue that black could have been if it hadn't stepped over the line.

There is no activity in the cosmos more unvarying, more predictable than the rate at which uranium turns into lead. That’s a good thing. If the universal clock was based on the rate at which novelty turns into routine, we might never show up at the dentist on time. Yet, sooner or later, however capriciously and imprecisely, the oh wow does decay into the ho-hum.

This is the room of the wolf-mother wallpaper.

Toward the east and the multiplying unknown.

We're proposing some stakes increases and more significant increases than the prior year. If the TOC agrees to those, that will take up some of that money. I think we will take a more aggressive approach to our overnights.

While Switters appreciated profanity's occasional value as verbal punctuation, as a highly effective vehicle for emphasis, he was scornful when louts swore as a substitute for vocabulary, youths as a substitute for rebellion, stand-up comics as a substitute for wit.

You've heard of people calling in sick. You may have called in sick a few times yourself. But have you ever thought about calling in well?

The trouble with seagulls is that they don't know if they're cats or dogs. Their cry is exactly midway between a bark and a meow.

There is no such thing as a weird human being, It's just that some people require more understanding than others.

This is the way to burn, the fuse seemed to be saying to the more docile, slow-witted candlewick. Brilliantly, ecstatically, irrepressibly. This is the way to burn.

True stability results when presumed order and presumed disorder are balanced. A truly stable system expects the unexpected, is prepared to be disrupted, waits to be transformed.

We've got something for just about everyone. I think our horsemen and our fans are going to be tickled with what we have to offer.

Author Picture
First Name
Last Name
Robbins, fully Thomas Eugene "Tom" Robbins
Birth Date

American Novelist