Will Rogers, fully William Penn Adair "Will" Rogers

Rogers, fully William Penn Adair "Will" Rogers

American Cowboy, Actor, Humorist, Social Commentator and Vaudeville Performer

Author Quotes

Why don’t they pass a Constitutional Amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as Prohibition did, in five years we will have the smartest people on earth.

You can take a sob story and a stick of candy and lead America right off into the Dead Sea.

You know how Congress is. They’ll vote for anything if the thing they vote for will turn around and vote for them.

Your mothers get mighty shocked at you girls nowadays, but in her day, her mother was just on the

Why don't somebody print the truth about our present economic situation? We spent six years of wild buying on credit -- everything under the sun, whether we needed it or not -- and now we are having to pay for 'em, and we are howling like a pet coon.

You can take any line of business and skill and the ones who do it the best are the ones who get the most money for it.

You know Lincoln's famous remark about God must have loved the common people, because he made so many of them? Well, you are not going to get people's votes nowadays by calling 'em common. Lincoln might have said it, but I bet it was not until after he was elected.

You've got to be optimist to be a Democrat, and you've got to be a humorist to stay one.

Why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as well as prohibition did, in five years Americans would be the smartest race of people on Earth.

You can’t have a picnic unless the party carrying the basket comes.

You know the more you read and observe about this Politics thing, you got to admit that each party is worse than the other. The one that's out always looks the best. My only solution would be to keep em both out one term and hire my good friend Henry Ford to run the whole thing, and give him a commission on what he saves us.

You've got to go out on a limb sometimes because that's where the fruit is.

Why don't they use a sales tax? That is the only fair and just tax. Have no tax on necessary foods, and moderate priced necessary clothes, but put a tax on every other thing you buy or use. Then the rich fellow who buys more and uses more certainly has no way of getting out of paying his share. Collect it at the source, that is at the manufacturer's. Don't depend on the retailer. Put big taxes on everything of a luxury nature. You do that, and let the working man know the rich have paid before they got it and you will do more than any one thing to settle some of the unrest and dissatisfaction that you hear every day. No slick lawyer or income tax expert can get you out of a sales tax.

You can’t legislate intelligence and common sense into people. You can’t broaden a man’s vision if he wasn’t born with one.

You know you are getting old when everything either dries up or leaks.

Why even the poor farmer took a raise of another ten percent just to get a loan from the bank, and nobody from the government paid any attention. But you let Wall Street have a nightmare and the whole country has to help to get them back into bed again.

You can’t say that civilization don’t advance... in every war they kill you in a new way.

You know, everybody's ignorant, just on different subjects.

Why not go out on a limb? That's where the fruit is.

You can't break a man that don't borrow; he may not have anything, but Boy! he can look the World in the face and say, I don't owe you Birds a nickel. You will say, (if everyone stops borrowing) what will all the Bankers do? I don't care what they do. Let 'em go to work, if there is any job any of them could earn a living at. Banking and After-Dinner Speaking are two of the most Non-essential industries we have in this country. I am ready to reform if they are.

You know, we're always talking about pioneers and what great folks the old pioneers were. Well, I think if we just stopped and looked at history in the face, the pioneer wasn't a thing in the world but a guy that wanted something for nothing. He was a guy that wanted to live off of everything that nature had done. He wanted to cut a tree down that didn't cost him anything, but he never did plant one. He wanted to plow up the land that should have been left to grass. We're just now learning that we can rob from nature the same way as we can rob from an individual. All he had was an ax, and a plow, and a gun, and he just went out and lived off nature. But really, he thought it was nature he was living off of, but it was really future generations that he was living off of.

Why sleep at home when you can sleep in Congress?

You can't legitimately kick on income tax, for it's on what you have made. You have already made it. But, look at land, farms, homes, stores, vacant lots. You pay year after year on them whether you make it or not.

You must judge a man’s greatness by how much he will be missed.

Why, every lot out here has its own agent. Agents get rich out here just off the various commissions on one lot. If an agent handles two lots he opens up a branch office and has an assistant.

Author Picture
First Name
Last Name
Rogers, fully William Penn Adair "Will" Rogers
Birth Date
Death Date

American Cowboy, Actor, Humorist, Social Commentator and Vaudeville Performer