George Ade


American Humorist, Dramatist, Author

Author Quotes

Early to bed and early to rise, and you'll meet very few of our best people.

Moral: In uplifting, get underneath.

For parlor use, the vague generality is a life saver.

Moral: It all depends.

He had been kicked in the head by a mule when young, and believed everything he read in the Sunday papers.

Notre Dame is sold out, and Akron and Iowa will be by the end of the week. In the next two weeks, Northwestern should be a sellout.

A friend who is near and dear may in time become as useless as a relative.

I feel like a lion in a den of Daniels.

Of all Sad Words of Tongue or Pen, the Saddest are these, "It Might Have Been."

A good folly is worth what you pay for it.

If it were not for the presents, an elopement would be preferable.

Only the more rugged mortals should attempt to keep up with current literature

A lot of smart young people have come out of Indiana. The smarter they are, the faster they come out.

If we still had the six-game season ticket available, I'm convinced all the five-game packages would have been six-game sales. But it was a record-breaking year for ticket sales no matter how you look at it.

She was a soprano of the kind often used for augmenting grief at a funeral.

A man never feels more important than when he receives a telegram containing more than ten words.

In the city a funeral is just an interruption of traffic; in the country it is a form of popular entertainment.

She was short on intellect, but long on shape

A people so primitive that they did not know how to get money except by working for it.

In uplifting, get underneath.

Some are born great, some achieve greatness, and others have it pinned on them.

A Piker always has his entire Stock of Goods in the Show Window.

It is not time for mirth and laughter, the cold, gray dawn of the morning after.

The music teacher came twice a week to bridge the awful gap between Dorothy and Chopin.

After being turned down by numerous publishers, he decided to write for posterity.

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American Humorist, Dramatist, Author