Great Throughts Treasury

"What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country."

"When among the graves of thy fellows, walk with circumspection; thine own is open at thy feet."

"What this country needs, what every country needs, occasionally is a good hard bloody war to revive the vice of patriotism on which its existence as a nation depends."

"When he had ended, the holy hermit was a moment silent, then said: My son, I have attended to thy story and I know the maiden. I have myself seen her, as have many. Know, then, that she is capricious for she imposeth conditions that man cannot fulfill, and delinquency is punished by desertion. She cometh only when unsought, and will not be questioned. One manifestation of curiosity, one sign of doubt, one expression of misgiving, and she is away!"

"When God makes a beautiful woman, the devil opens a new register."

"When in Rome, do as Rome does."

"When lost in a forest go always down hill. When lost in a philosophy or doctrine go upward."

"When publicly censured our first instinct is to make everybody a codefendant."

"When you have made a catalogue of your friend's faults it is only fair to supply him with a duplicate, so that he may know yours."

"When prosperous the fool trembles for the evil that is to come; in adversity the philosopher smiles for the good that he has had."

"When you are ill make haste to forgive your enemies, for you may recover."

"While your friend holds you affectionately by both your hands, you are safe, for you can watch both his."

"White, adj. and n. Black."

"Wisdom is known only by contrasting it with folly; by shadow only we perceive that all visible objects are not flat. Yet Philanthropos would abolish evil!"

"While you have a future do not live too much in contemplation of your past: unless you are content to walk backward the mirror is a poor guide."

"Witticism. A sharp and clever remark, usually quoted and seldom noted; what the Philistine is pleased to call a ''joke.''"

"Wit. The salt with which the American humorist spoils his intellectual cookery by leaving it out."

"Woman absent is woman dead."

"Women in love are less ashamed than men. They have less to be ashamed of."

"Witch, n. (1) An ugly and repulsive old woman, in a wicked league with the devil. (2) A beautiful and attractive young woman, in wickedness a league beyond the devil."

"Year, n. A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments."

"Woman would be more charming if one could fall into her arms without falling into her hands."

"You are not permitted to kill a woman who has wronged you, but nothing forbids you to reflect that she is growing older every minute. You are avenged 1440 times a day."

"Year: A period of three hundred and sixty-five disappointments."

"You don't have to be stupid to be a Christian... but it probably helps."

"Youth is Gilead, in which is balm for every wound."

"You scoundrel, you have wronged me, hissed the philosopher, May you live forever!"

"Youth looks forward, for nothing is behind! Age backward, for nothing is before."

"Zeal, n. A certain nervous disorder afflicting the young and inexperienced. A passion that goeth before a sprawl."

"Youth, n. The Period of Possibility, when Archimedes finds a fulcrum, Cassandra has a following and seven cities compete for the honor of endowing a living Homer."

"Zeus, n. The chief of Grecian gods, adored by the Romans as Jupiter and by the modern Americans as God, Gold, Mob and Dog. Some explorers who have touched upon the shores of America, and one who professes to have penetrated a considerable distance to the interior, have thought that these four names stand for as many distinct deities, but in his monumental work on Surviving Faiths, Frumpp insists that the natives are monotheists, each having no other god than himself, whom he worships under many sacred names."

"Zoology, n. The science and history of the animal kingdom, including its king, the house fly (musca maledicta.) The father of zoology was aristotle, as is universally conceded, but the name of its mother has not come down to us."

"Zloslovie.- malice attributed to another stupid acts that alone did not have a case or temptation to commit."