Helen Rowland

Helen
Rowland
1875
1950

American Journalist and Humorist

Author Quotes

A wise woman puts a grain of sugar into everything she says to a man, and takes a grain of salt with everything he says to her.

In love, somehow, a man's heart is always either exceeding the speed limit, or getting parked in the wrong place.

Marrying an old bachelor is like buying second-hand furniture.

The woman who appeals to a man's vanity may stimulate him, the woman who appeals to his heart may attract him, but it is the woman who appeals to his imagination who gets him.

Why does a man take it for granted that a girl who flirts with him wants him to kiss her - when, nine times out of ten, she only wants him to want to kiss her?

A woman's flattery may inflate a man's head a little; but her criticism goes straight to his heart, and contracts it so that it can never again hold quite as much love for her

In olden times sacrifices were made at the altar - a practice which is still continued.

Never trust a husband too far, nor a bachelor too near.

There are only two kinds of men; the dead and the deadly.

Woman: the peg on which the wit hangs his jest, the preacher his text, the cynic his grouch and the sinner his justification.

After a few years of marriage a man can look right at a woman without seeing her and a woman can see right through a man without looking at him.

It is easier to keep half a dozen lovers guessing than to keep one lover after he has stopped guessing.

Never worry for fear you have broken a man's heart; at the worst it is only sprained and a week's rest will put it in perfect working condition again.

There are people whose watch stops at a certain hour and who remain permanently at that age.

You will never win if you never begin.

After marriage, a woman's sight becomes so keen that she can see right through her husband without looking at him, and a man's so dull that he can look right through his wife without seeing her.

It isn't tying himself to one woman that a man dreads when he thinks of marrying; it's separating himself from all the others.

No girl who is going to marry need bother to win a college degree; she just naturally becomes a Master of Arts and a Doctor of Philosophy after catering to an ordinary man for a few years.

There's so much saint in the worst of them, and so much devil in the best of them, that a woman who's married to one of them, has nothing to learn of the rest of them.

And verily, a woman need know but one man well, in order to understand all men; whereas a man may know all women and understand not one of them.

It takes one woman twenty years to make a man of her son - and another woman twenty minutes to make a fool of him.

No man can understand why a woman shouldn't prefer a good reputation to a good time.

To a woman the first kiss is just the end of the beginning but to a man it is the beginning of the end.

A Bachelor of Arts is one who makes love to a lot of women, and yet has the art to remain a bachelor.

Before marriage, a man declares that he would lay down his life to serve you after marriage, he won't even lay down his newspaper to talk to you.

Author Picture
First Name
Helen
Last Name
Rowland
Birth Date
1875
Death Date
1950
Bio

American Journalist and Humorist