Great Throughts Treasury

"If your time is worth anything, travel by air. If not, you might just as well walk."

"If you're riding ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and then"

"Ignorance lies not in the things you don't know, but in the things you know that ain't so."

"I'll bet you the time ain't far off when a woman won't know any more than a man."

"I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!"

"I'm not a real movie star. I still got the same wife I started out with nearly 28 years ago."

"Imagine a man in public office that everybody knew where he stood. We wouldn’t call him a statesman, we would call him a curiosity."

"In a real estate man's eye, the most expensive part of the city is where he has a house to sell."

"In Europe public men do resign. But here it's a lost art. You have to impeach 'em."

"In Hollywood the woods are full of people that learned to write but evidently can't read. If they could read their stuff, they'd stop writing."

"In Hollywood you can see things at night that are fast enough to be in the Olympics in the day time."

"In schools they have what they call intelligence tests. Well if nations held ’em I don’t believe we would be what you would call a favorite to win it."

"In the early days of the Indian Territory, there were no such things as birth certificates. You being there was certificate enough."

"In the Middle West now you got to put a brand on your soil, then in the Spring go on a round-up looking for it."

"In this country people don’t vote for, they vote against."

"In Washington, one man could do what ten of them do. There could be only a quarter or a third as many congressmen or senators, and we would pick better ones then. But it's the system that we have always used, and there is no use getting all overcome with perspiration over it. Things kinder run themselves, anyhow."

"Income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has."

"Indians and primitive races were the highest civilized because they were more satisfied and they depended less on each other and took less from each other."

"Instead of giving money to found colleges to promote learning, why don't they pass a constitutional amendment prohibiting anybody from learning anything? If it works as good as the Prohibition one did, why, in five years we would have the smartest race of people on earth."

"It costs ten times more to govern us than it used to, and we are not governed one-tenth as good."

"It doesn't much signify whom one marries, for one is sure to find out the next morning that it was someone else."

"It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep."

"It is easier to fool ’em in Washington than at home. So why not be a Senator."

"It isn't what we don't know that gives us trouble, it's what we know that ain't so."

"It looks like the financial giants of the world have bungled as much as the diplomats and politicians. This would be a great time in the world for some man to come along that knew something."

"It looks to me like any man that wants to be President in times like these lacks something."

"It looks to me like the candidates are trying to relieve the farmer of his vote, instead of his debts."

"It must be nice to belong to some legislative body and just pick money out of the air."

"It rained in the Middle West. Farmers are learning that the relief they get from the sky beats what they get from Washington."

"It seemed to be the unanimous opinion of the convention that the management of the United States should be entirely in the hands of lawyers and judges, and that elected representatives of the people didn't know what they was doing."

"It takes a lifetime to build a good reputation, but you can lose it in a minute."

"It takes nerve to be a Democrat, but it takes money to be a Republican."

"It takes quite a sense of humor for these people to understand us shaking hands with one hand and shooting with the other."

"It was the luckiest thing that ever happened to me. Betty [his wife] is to blame for it all. Whatever I am or have accomplished, I owe to Betty. I ain't got no sense. My wife made me what I am. In other words-local girl makes good in the city-makes good man."

"It wasn’t what we needed then that was hurting us, it was what we was paying for that we had already used up. The country was just buying gasoline for a leaky tank. Everything was going into a gopher hole and you couldent see where you was going to get any of it back."

"It won’t be no time until some woman will become so desperate politically and lose all prospectus of right and wrong and maybe go from bad to worse and finally wind up in the Senate. Men gave ’em the right to vote but never meant for them to take it seriously. But being women they took the wrong meaning and did."

"It’s a great country but you can’t live in it for nothing."

"It’s awful hard to get people interested in corruption unless they can get some of it."

"It’s going to be hard to make an issue of corruption. It’s like the poor, it’s always been with us."

"It’s great to be great, but it’s greater to be human."

"It’s not what you pay a man but what he costs you that counts."

"It's a good thing the American people aren't getting all the government they're paying for."

"It's a good thing we don't get all the government we pay for."

"It's almost been worth this depression to find out how little our big men know."

"It's easy being a humorist when you've got the whole government working for you."

"It's getting so if a man wants to stand well socially, he can't afford to be seen with either the Democrats or the Republicans."

"It's great to be great, but its greater to be human."

"It's no laughing matter being a Republican in these perilous times. Anyone can be a Republican when the stock market is up, but when stocks are selling for no more than they're worth, I tell you, being a Republican -- it's a sacrifice."

"It's not what we don't know that hurts. It's what we know that ain't so."

"It's not what you pay a man, but what he costs you that counts."